 | Diary Navigation:
|
March 6, 2001
I’m due in 65 days. It is incredible. I keep thinking about how amazingly things have changed in the last few years. I mean, while I was in school, time seemed to stretch on forever. Every day, every week was the same. I was changing, but it’s hard to see yourself. And now, I can judge the passage of time through my children. Not only through my children, but my friends’ children. I see where their lives have moved them, and I’m in awe of what time has done to us all.
It seems as my pregnancy progresses, I can’t help remembering the way we all used to be. I haven’t seen most of my close friends from high school in years, not since shortly after graduation. I hear from some of them occasionally, but not at all as much as I would like. I wish we all lived closer than we do.
I’ve been feeling rather lonely lately and wishing I could have a baby shower. I hear about the pregnant women on my email lists having showers and it sounds like so much fun. But I don’t really need anything for the baby, and I don’t have any friends who could come anyway. I’m just feeling mopey about it.
It looks like I won’t be able to get Jake to that hearing evaluation after all. He was getting insurance through my mother’s work, but they switched insurance companies and now can’t seem to keep Jake on their records. Mom has been paying a great deal of money out of every paycheck to have him covered, and we still haven’t received an insurance card. They also can’t ever find his name in their computers. The pediatrician knows we will pay out-of-pocket if the insurance won’t pay, but we can’t afford a hearing evaluation ourselves. Luckily, Jake is talking more. He imitates everything, with often hilarious results. And is constantly surprising us with new words.
Jake is also having issues with night terrors. He’ll suddenly start crying in his sleep, and there is nothing I can do to calm him or wake him. It’s very disturbing and frustrating. I do what I can to keep him from hurting himself, and eventually he will wake up. Poor baby. I hope this is a phase he quickly moves through.
I also wish I knew some kids he could play with every once in a while. He’s not in daycare, and I can’t afford to enroll him in any programs. It was suggested to me by a friend that I start a playgroup for the toddlers in my area, but I fear there aren’t many parents who practice attachment parenting out here. And I’m certain there are even fewer Wiccan families. My parenting style is objectionable to many people; I am raising my children Wiccan, co sleeping, no spanking, baby wearing, extended breastfeeding, I’m looking into homeschooling... I’ve only met parents like me online, and never in my community. Then again, parents like me tend to keep very quiet. I wouldn’t object to my son playing with the children of more mainstream parents, but those parents frequently object to me. Ah well, perhaps I’ll found a Wiccan homeschooling co-op. :)
 |  |
|
want to keep a diary on iParenting?
Authoring a diary on the iParenting network allows you to chronicle your family's story, preserving it for years to come. It's also a great way to get the most out of the iParenting community. Click here to start...
|
The iParenting Media Awards program helps parents find the best products for their families. 
