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Amy's Diary Entries Diary Navigation: Choose A Diary Entry -------------------- Latest Entry: 4/19/02 -------------------- 1/21/02 12/30/01 11/12/01 9/7/01 9/1/01 8/18/01 7/7/01 6/12/01 5/3/01 4/10/01 3/12/01 2/3/01 1/4/01 1/3/01 12/30/00 12/6/00 11/28/00 11/4/00 10/31/00 10/25/00 10/11/00 10/5/00 9/28/00 9/19/00 9/15/00 9/7/00 8/23/00 8/17/00 8/9/00 8/4/00 7/20/00 7/12/00 7/6/00 6/22/00 6/14/00 6/8/00 5/24/00 5/16/00 5/15/00 5/14/00 5/13/00 5/12/00 5/9/00 4/28/00 4/13/00 4/6/00 3/30/00 3/24/00 3/16/00 3/9/00 2/29/00 2/4/00 -------------------- Amy's Introduction

December 30, 2001

Yikes! I just read my entry from one year ago, since it was featured on the front page, and I cannot believe a year has passed since! So much has changed in one little year - and my fears then have been replaced with more current fears - but one thing remains the same... Sam still nurses. Granted, he nurses less and less all the time, but he nurses several times a day even now. I know my supply is way down. I had a mammogram on Christmas eve and the doctor said he couldn't tell I was lactating at all, in reference to the size/presence of milk glands. I know I still have milk, but obviously, not much. It goes without saying that when Sam nurses it is for comfort reasons, and not nutrional. And after nursing for almost three years, I won't even try to pretend I'm not completely emotionally attached to it as well. I do have moments when I wish he would wean soon. He is so active, and is always fidgeting with my body, scratching, pulling, poking, and I often get hurt (not badly of course) when he nurses. Or maybe I should just say that it is often uncomfortable ("hurt" was too strong of a word).

Still not sure about the lump in my breast, however, I am seeing a different doctor who is taking a more aggressive approach to determining the problem. He isn't concerned about it, but isn't willing to not know everything about it that he (reasonably) can. He is a combination OBGYN/Oncologist (sp? - too late and too tired to look it up to make sure it is spelled correctly). I should have the results of the mammogram in about another week, and he wants to talk to me again then, regardless. Meanwhile, he wants me to discontinue taking birth control pills since they have some kind of negative effect on cancer - I'm not sure I remember the details. I'm only taking them to control the growth of endometriosos and not for birth control, so I won't miss them anyway. During the exam, they found several more (but much smaller) lump-kinds-of-things that are near the larger lump that I found. We'll see...

I have finally closed on my new house! I'm very excited about getting the work done on it and get moved in. I admit this: I'm a little afraid, too. I've never lived alone, and although I'm OLD (31 next month), I'm still terrified of the dark, and of being alone. Guess I'll be getting over that soon! lol!

Sam is getting smarter every day. He knows all of the words to many songs and sings all the time. He hasn't grown much - will be lucky if he weighs in at 24 at his 3-year-old check-up next month. He's a great performer most of the time, but seems lately to be grumpy more than not, which I hope is the fault of his molars. The fourth one (in this set) is finally coming through. He's been working on this set for about 2 months, and they have been vicious. This last tooth seems worst of all. Other than that, his behavior tends to be a bit on the bratty/whiney side, and that is hard to confess. Hopefully it's normal 3 year old behavior. :-) On the other hand, a good bit of the time, he is just wonderful. He just prefers undivided attention... and don't we all? He is very affectionate, and my personal favorite thing he does is when he wraps his skinny little arms around my neck and kisses me.

I have to report this one (of a million) very funny thing he did just today. He was being fussy when I was trying to get him dressed and up for the day this morning, and I told him that he needed to be thankful to Jesus because He is so good to him. I told Sam to take a breath in, which he did, and I said, See, Jesus gave you that breath, and you should thank him. Sam's whine became a full-fledged cry and he exclaimed, "But I want Jesus to give me a fresh breath, because that one was stinky!" Pretty funny stuff...

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